Digital Underground - uXu - Underground eXperts United #uxu-262

### ### ### ### ### #### ### ### ### #### ### ### ##### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ##### ### ### ########## ### ### ########## ### ### ### ### Underground eXperts United Presents... ####### ## ## ####### # # ####### ####### ####### ## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ## #### ## ## #### # # ####### ####### ####### ## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ## ## ## ## ####### ####### # # ####### ####### ####### [ To Kill a Bouncer ] [ By The GNN ] ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ "TO KILL A BOUNCER" by THE GNN/DualCrew-Shining/uXu "But I just had two beers! I cannot possibly be drunk and..." Enough, Ray thought and grabbed the man by his left arm. After that followed what Ray enjoyed most with his work. He dragged the complaining man away from the bar, over the dance floor (so all his friends could see the man being humiliated) and finally to the door, where he violently threw him out with the magic words "... and I don't wanna see yer face around this club again!" The poor man landed flat on his back and hopefully ruined his expensive suit on the dirty street. Ray put on his macho stare and waited for the man to say something annoying, so he did not have to hesitate when he punched him over the nose. Unfortunately, the man said nothing, so Ray had to make up a story five minutes later when the cops arrived and took care of the bleeding and unconscious man. "He was very drunk. I threw him out. He said he was going to kill me and then he attacked me. So I gave him a few blows." "Good," the police man said, "we'll take care of this nut from here." The police car roared away and Ray went back to his beloved work. This evening he broke his old record by throwing out eleven people and knocking down seven of them. Ray worked as a bouncer at a rather popular place in the city, namely the Camel Club. The place was regarded as an 'exclusive' place, which meant that no nasty kids with knives were around and the visitors wore expensive clothing. Ray knew that he was lucky because other exclusive places seldom allowed their bouncers to throw people out without consulting the manager first. But at the Camel Club there could be only one king; Ray Lundgren, the one and only. Ray never said that he was a bouncer - that term did not fit the artistic side of his work, he meant. He preferred to say that he was 'a kind of musician who played on his different instruments; strength, stamina and pure joy'. When he started to work at the club the old ignorant manager had told him that the former bouncer had a nice little quote he used to follow: "If you have a good time here, I will have a good time too!" Ray thought that it sounded like a rather nice thing to say. Because if people had too fun at the club, Ray could have a good time too by kicking them out. Fun, according to Ray, was when people talked too loud, laughed too loud or began chatting with some cute girl at the club that Ray desperately wanted to drill. Every night, Ray argued with people and threw them out. Paradise, he thought, until that day a new bouncer began working at the club. Ray could not understand why the manager had hired another man. Was not Ray enough? Had Ray screwed up lately? Had Ray by mistake thrown out some local celebrity that happened to be a close friend to the owner? Ray did not know. The new bouncer was called Henry. That was according to the boss, because Henry never said a word himself. He was very big, a crew-cut on his head and he wore black sunglasses all the time. Ray looked like a mouse beside him, and that was something that Ray could not accept. The first evening Henry worked there Ray stared right into his black sunglasses and informed him that he ought to obey every word Ray said. Henry did not reply. He just grunted something. In Ray's ears, it was an insult. The ego of Ray became smaller and smaller. Henry had proven himself to be an excellent bouncer. He could grab up to four people at once with his strong hands and throw them across the club and out through the door with deadly precision. He never made any mistakes, he always got his man. Suddenly, Ray discovered that he had not thrown out nor punched someone for weeks. Henry did all the work. Who was this guy? Ray wondered. He never said a word, he was strong and handsome. He had a strange face though; his nose was almost flat, and his lips were bigger than what could be called that standard size. And he never took those darn sunglasses off his face. He always arrived to work before Ray, and he never left the club until Ray was gone. Perhaps he never left the club at all? Ray knew that he had to find out more about this guy. After a hectic Saturday night, Ray said bye to the staff and walked to his car. But he did not go home. He drove one block before he made a fast u-turn and returned to the club to park across the street. Then he sat there all night, watching the door. But Henry never came out. At nine in the morning, Ray fell asleep. He woke up later that afternoon just to discover that he should be at the club in less than two hours. He spent the time by watching the door. Suddenly, Henry was there. He stood by the door in his black suit and watched the people who entered. Ray could not believe his eyes. But something was clear: Henry never left the club. But why? Ray had to find out the rest. Days and nights passed. Ray and Henry stood by the entrance and when a fight occurred Henry took care of it. Ray never did anything. He never got the chance. Henry saw everything, he was quicker and more effective. Ray knew he could not take it much longer. One night, when the place closed, Ray turned to Henry. "Hey dude, you wanna go and have a beer?" Henry did not reply. "Er.. I mean, we could get to know each other better and so on..." Henry looked at Ray. Ray saw his own reflection in the black glasses. "Man, what is you fucking problem!" Ray screamed and pushed Henry. Henry did not move. His body felt as if it was made of stone. After that chat, Ray never dared to speak to Henry again. Ray turned into a poor individual, a man that people knew they could laugh at. He began to drink at work. Every time Henry threw someone out Ray took up his bottle of whiskey and poured several ounces down his pipe. Ray was on the edge. He knew what he had to do. He had to kill Henry. Since Henry obviously never left the club, Ray had to perform the assassination there. He had a perfect plan. When the place closed and everyone had left, Ray would hide in one of the cabinets on the toilet. Then he would sneak through the club and find Henry. Ray knew that Henry could only be in a certain room: the office of the boss. After Henry had began working at the club, the boss never let anyone enter his office. Hence, Henry had to be in there. Four days later, Ray decided to fulfill his mission. He hid himself in the cabinet and waited for everyone to leave. After a couple of hours he heard the door shut for the last time. He was alone with his nemesis. Ray sneaked out from the toilet and made his way to the kitchen. He had all the keys needed, so the penetration was no problem. Ray put on his gloves and picked up the meanest knife he could find in the kitchen. This one was made for taking out that bastard, Ray thought and chuckled. Now he just had to find the poor victim. Ray made his way to the office of the boss. He hesitated by the door. Then he placed his ear to the door and listened. He could hear someone snore. Bingo. Carefully, Ray opened the door and stepped inside. The room was completely dark. Ray held the knife hard in his hand. His heart beat faster and faster. This was it, he thought. This was the end of Henry. This was the end of his enemy. Ray turned on the light. He saw Henry sleeping on a mattress on the floor. He had no clothes on - his big black suit lied on a chair. Ray could not move. He was scared to death. Henry was not human. Ray dropped the knife and walked backwards, towards the door. Then he turned around and ran away in fear. He had seen the bouncer of the future. He knew that his job was no more. The bouncer of the future did not need any money nor union. He probably just needed a little training a few bananas now and then. Henry was a shaved gorilla. //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// We live, work, die. We must have a new dawn. Are you able to step out of the cage? Call THE STASH! +46-13-YOHO \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ Lights, camera, revolution. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- uXu #262 Underground eXperts United 1995 uXu #262 Call PEGASUS -> +41-71-715577 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------

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