OBS! Denna textfil ingår i ett arkiv som är dedikerat att bevara svensk undergroundkultur, med målsättningen att vara så heltäckande som möjligt. Flashback kan inte garantera att innehållet är korrekt, användbart eller baserat på fakta, och är inte heller ansvariga för eventuella skador som uppstår från användning av informationen.
### ### ### ### ### #### ### ### ### #### ### ### ##### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ##### ### ### ########## ### ### ########## ### ### ### ### Underground eXperts United Presents... ####### ## ## ####### # # ####### ####### ## ## ## ## ## ## ##### # ## ## ## ## #### ## ## #### # # #### ## ####### ## ## ## ## ##### # ## ## ## ## ## ####### ####### # # ####### ## ## [ The Crowd and the Stigma ] [ By The GNN ] ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ THE CROWD AND THE STIGMA by THE GNN/DualCrew-Shining/uXu Every night, I have the same dream. It is not a nightmare, but is still bothering me, day in and day out. I am not afraid of it. I just wish to understand it. A crowd has gathered to enjoy and exploit the mere company of each other. I stand outside it, observing the people and their games. They laugh, they dance and they sing. I do not wish to participate, because I believe they are all false. Therefore, I am not dissatisfied with my position. I have, after all, chosen it myself. My left arm hurts. Then, I hear someone calling for me, from inside the massive crowd. At first, I try to pretend that I am not aware of the voice. I try to cheat myself into the belief that it is not my name that is shouted. But I fail. My eyes begin to wander over the group of people. I see a person in the middle of it, looking at me, wanting me to join the crowd. How strange. I thought the shadows made me invisible. So I step out of the shadows and slowly make my way into the group. I am not alone anymore, yet without being a part of the personality of the crowd. But I fail to localize the person who called my name. I search and I search, but every time I have almost reached the person, she disappears farther into the crowd. She is trying to avoid me, and I cannot understand why. After all, she was the one who called my name. She wanted me to come, but at the same time not, I say to myself. And I just cannot understand why. My despair increases with every failed attempt to find the person. I blame the crowd for not letting me succeed; they push and pull me in different directions all the time. Suddenly, a thought pops into my mind: maybe the crowd does not exist? Perhaps I just believe it is there? And suddenly - as if an invisible flash of lightning had struck me - my mind opens up completely, my eyes see the truth. The crowd, the hunt, the failures, is understood to its fullest extent: it is my stigma, the tattoo I carved into my own arm in the belief that it would protect me, that now stops me from succeeding with my task of finding the person who called my name. Realizing this, the crowd vanishes. It is as if it had never existed. The only ones left are you and I. But you look away, avoiding meeting my eyes. As you turn around to flee deeper into the crowd - that now only exists in your own mind - I see that you carry the same stigma on your arm. ///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// There is no such thing as 'the public good'. Hey, mail a letter to <gnn@update.uu.se> just for the hell of it. \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ A cop is a state paid gangster. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- uXu #374 Underground eXperts United 1997 uXu #374 Call SOTH'S DOMAIN -> +1-401-463-8889 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------